it was 11:15 in the evening, 45 minutes till midnight, binky mcsmithers leaned against his car looking at the stars. He pulled a pall mall from the pack and lit up.

as he inhaled the first draught of smoke, the tip of his cigarette CRACKLING with it's "birth", binky thought about his childhood, how he liked to imagine great adventures, and was told by those around him to "grow up" and how he was wrong in how he was thinking. Binky didn't argue. he didn't like to argue. he realized the ones who speak the loudest and the fastest were the ones who won the arguement, regardless of who was correct.

halfway into the cigarette's "life", which is also halfway to it's "death", binky blew smoke rings, and as the undulating rings of smoke floated
up
up
up
toward the stars and heaven, disipating as they rose skyward, binky thought of his life as an adult. He would share his ideas and dreams, fantastic and unrealistic as they might be, with his wife, who would point out the flaws in his plans and tell him how wrong he was, tell him how wrong his thoughts and feelings were. His daughter would tell him how wrong he was, speak to him with no respect at all. At work, he was told how wrong he was, and even though he managed to obtain a reletively high position at his office, his co-workers, bosses, underlings, all treated him with little to no respect. he was the butt of thier jokes, a mere amusement, never to be taken seriously.

Binky realized, in the gameshow of life, he was the all time worst contestant in history. any time he rang in with an answer, he heard the dissonant BZZZZZZZ of the wrong answer buzzer, and the flashing red X would flash onscreen to show those who may be hearing impared that Binky was wrong.

Binky realized his words were just ammunition he provided others to shoot him down with, cut him down and put him in his place. if you were having a bad day, you could always step on binky to elevate yourself. that was his job in life.

As the cigarette burned to the end, reaching the small printed words "pall mall" right against the filter, binky decided he would no longer play the game. He would no longer offer others the chance to show him how his thougths and feelings were wrong and not worthy of respect. Binky dropped the cigarette and as he ground it out with the tip of his shoe, binky decided he would live the rest of his life and never

ever.

ever.

talk.

again.

the day after

Another Halloween came and went. It didn’t feel like Halloween, probably cause I live in Arizona and there isn’t a crisp biting chill in the air and maple leaves are not all over clogging drains and gutters and rotting in the yard. I assume Christmas will not feel like it either. Sweet.

I didn’t have too many candy beggars knocking at my door, extorting candy out of me in fear they will terrorize my house with soap and toilet paper and eggs and such. The cool thing is, all the kids had costumes, unlike some places I lived where 15 year olds come asking for candy dressed as “a student” or “a rap artist.” Fuck you, at least pretend to give an effort.

I don’t understand the parents who bring infants, dressed in some dinosaur or tiger pajamas. The kid doesn’t even know where he is, and is sleeping in the car seat you are toting around. You come to my house and show me you have a kid and you want me to give you candy? Save the money you spent on gas and buy your own damn bag of snickers, moron.

And if a car pulls up and kids get out, that is just cheating. Like you aren’t fat enough, at least work for the candy. It’s like getting shaken down by the candy mafia. Makes me lose hope in mankind. Trick or treating has gotten jaded and there should be national rules that must be followed. Kids should have “trick or treat” classes in school, so everyone knows the protocol and dos and don’ts. That would rock.

But then you have the damned Christians who want to boycott Halloween, cause it’s evil. Getting dressed up as Batman for free Hershey bars *IS* doing Satan’s work, sure, I can see it, but then you should also not participate in Christmas, which originally was a celebration of the winter solstice. At the very least, they shouldn’t have a Christmas tree, as evidenced by this next bit I copied and pasted……
[The Norse pagans and Celtic Druids revered evergreens as manifestations of deity because they did not "die" from year to year but stayed green and alive when other plants appeared dead and bare. The trees represented everlasting life and hope for the return of spring.
The druids decorated their trees with symbols of prosperity -- a fruitful harvest, coins for wealth and various charms such as those for love or fertility. Scandinavian Pagans are thought to be the first to bring their decorated trees indoors as this provided a warm and welcoming environment for the native fairy folk and tree elementals to join in the festivities. The Saxons, a Germanic pagan tribe, were the first to place lights on the their trees in the form of candles. Ancient Romans decorated their homes with greens at the Festival of Saturnalia, their New Year and exchanged evergreen branches with friends as a sign of good luck. ]
Blah blah blah. It’s not like they will listen. I’m just saying….hope everyone had a spooky and fun Halloween.

Note to Trans and others who don't have halloween...you aren't missing much, it's lost it's fun over the years. but if you were to ever come to the states, drop by anytime, i'll give you free candy...